So it’s my birthday and I’m opening gifts. I open the wrapped box from my uncle.
I open the box, and find a $50 gift card, yes? But wait, there’s Styrofoam. There’s more.
Then I remove the Styrofoam…
A FUCKING LEGLESS LEGO LEGOLAS
mY UNCLE GOT ME A LEGLESS LEGO LEGOLAS
bEST BIRTHDAY GIFT EVER
he then later gave me the legs.
LEGO LEGOLAS’ LEGO LEGS
Are you Luna Lovegood
Loony Luna Lovegood Lavishly Loving LEGO Legolas’s LEGO Legs
you have 10 seconds to think of a way to make the average vampire movie fresh and new and exciting again
A vampire going through the daily struggles of trying to hide his ever lasting boner— as rigor mortis is an unkind friend.
a guy walked into the board room and said
"hi sweetheart if you could fix me up a coffee real quick im meeting with the regional reports manager in like five minutes, thanks darling"
and i just stared at him and coldly said
"i am the regional reports manager"
we are now twenty minutes into this board meeting and i dont think i’ve ever seen a man look so embarrassed and afraid in my whole life
I think that if they make abortion illegal, they should make men deserting women who they got pregnant illegal as well. Because if a woman can’t back out of a pregnancy a man shouldn’t be able to either.
BUT THEY ARE YOUNG AND HAVE THEIR WHOLE LIVES AHEAD AND IT’S GONNA RUIN THEIR CAREER AND RELATIONSHIPS AND
because that doesn’t happen with women amirite
Watch her face when she listens to her favorite song, or when she reads her favorite part of her favorite book, or when she’s watching her favorite movie. You see how happy she is? Try your best to keep her that happy.Unknown (via perfect)
Don’t date anyone who’s intimidated by feminism.
Don’t date anyone who thinks it’s a threat to men and masculinity.
Love yourself. Don’t settle for a piece of shit.